Barstool Sports

Monday, August 22, 2005

5 Movies that ruined my weekend


Your old Uncle Buck had a big weekend planned with lots of projects and events, which were ruined by my television. The following are movies that for one reason or another distracted me from performing my duties. Some happened to be on TV when I walked through the room and hypnotized me into sitting on the arm of the couch and catching the final 30 minutes or so, while one of the films I rented and watched with my brother.

1. Caddyshack:


D'Annunzio: Well I ain't payin' no 50 cents for no Coke!

Noonan: Oh, ho, then you ain't gettin no Coke! knowwhatImtalkinabout?


Lou: What's that sign say?

Angie: No bare feet.

Lou: What's THAT sign say?

Angie: No fighting.


Well don't just stand there, get some glue!

2. Sin City:


These are the old days, the bad days, the all-or-nothing days. They're back! There's no choice left. And I'm ready for war.


An old man dies. A young girl lives. A fair trade.


Oh, sugar, you just gone and done the dumbest thing in your whole life.

3. Slumber Party Massacre:


I don't know if I can go. My mom's on my case about my grades.


Well life goes on after all and eating makes me feel best when I feel bad and boy do I feel bad. (I actually don't recall any lines from this movie, I basically TiVoed through it.)

4. Summer School:


Can I call my mom and tell her I won't be home... ever?


It was an accident. I'll take it again. I can fail, I know I can!


Chainsaw's sister: How do you spell Cat?

Chainsaw: I don't know!!

5. Dead Calm:


Get off my boat!


Phew, he's finally off our boat...


She's been plucked more times than the Rose of Tralee...Biggest whore on 5th avenue...I'm Told!

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