Barstool Sports

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Roids, voids and Double Play-Rod wins the MVP

Your Uncle Buck has decided to finally give A-Fraud his props...For now UB will no longer refer to the new AL MVP as A-Fraud, rather he will be known as Double Play-Rod, thanks to a WEEI caller that made UB crack up in the car today. As far as the MVP race goes, your Uncle Buck already made his case a few months ago...and UB doesn't want to say he told you so, but...he told you so...

"I still love ya Papi!"

"So wait, Papi lost the MVP race, then what is this celebration for? Another Red Sox crap..."

Big game MVP? Well Red Sox and Yankoff fans can finally agree about something...

UB was angry to hear Today that, according to, Theo Epstein apparently made some overtures to John Henry about returning to the Sox. If this is true then UB doesn't want Theo back. How can you trust that he would stick it out for the long haul if leaving the Red Sox was nothing more than an emotional blow up. Don't get UB wrong, he still blames the douchebag owners, but come on Theo...

Lastly, your Uncle Buck was happy to see the new steroid rules come down from Congress, and not from MLB (on the same day the Orioles dropped Rafael Palmeiro and Sammy Sosa). Those clowns had a chance to get their act together and UB's glad that the government stepped in on this. That being said, UB hopes this is not just empty promises. Here is the new rules according to

First positive test -- 50-game suspension, up from 10 days.

Second positive test -- 100-game suspension, up from 30 days.

Third positive test -- Lifetime ban, with player having right to apply for reinstatement after two years and an arbitrator being able to review reinstatement decision. Under the previous agreement, the earliest a player could be suspended for life was for a fifth positive test.• In addition, a conviction for possession carries a 60-to-80 game penalty, while a second offense carries a 120-game to one-year penalty. A third offense nets the offender a lifetime ban. If a player is convicted for distribution, he will be suspended 80-to-100 games, while a second offense equals a lifetime ban.

Testing frequency: A player will be tested during spring training physicals and at least once during the regular season, with additional random testing. Under the previous agreement, each player was tested once from the start of spring training through the end of the regular season, with additional random testing. Both the new agreement and the previous deal provided off seasonason testing.



At 10:24 AM, Blogger Dr Will said...

the penalties are too stiff UB! 50 games! thats overboard!

At 4:35 PM, Blogger Uncle Buck said...

NO way, if UB had his way it would be lifetime ban after 2nd offense...these rich jerks should not be using Roids...PERIOD


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