Barstool Sports

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

The Dice-K effect: The Top 5 Changes At Fenway Park

It looks like the Sox are in line to sign Daisuke Matsuzaka, aka Dice-K, which could bring a few changes to Fenway Park. Here are UB's Top 5:

1. New Ads

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2. Dog meat in Fenway Frank hot dogs

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3. Ben Affleck dumps Jennifer Garner for Yoko Matsugane


"Armageddon just got released over there...She thinks I'm a big star...hahaha"

4. Dr. Charles Steinberg translates "Tessie" into Japanese and plays between innings 9 times a game


"Mata ah-oo hima de Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto"

5. Japanese celebs throw out the 1st pitch


Just one more thing on this topic...As most of you know Scott Boras (pronounced Bore-ASS) is the agent for Dice-K. Wouldn't it be great if he dressed up in Japanese garb the way Classie Freddy Blassie used to get dressed up in different outfits to represent his wrestlers...
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Remember when Blassie used to dress up like a Russian when he was with Nikolai Volkoff or the way he became Ayatollah Blassie while with the Iron Sheik? Imagine Boras coming out for the presser dressed up in a Japanese martial arts outfit, or better yet a sumo wrestler?

1 Comments:

At 9:56 PM, Anonymous Duke Davis said...

It'd be greatif D-Mat just cut a bunch of promos in Japanese while Boras would shout "Haha! Yes! Bali Bali! Haha!"

 

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