Barstool Sports

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Stephen Hawking: Space case

World's smartest man Stephen Hawking has announced that for the human race to survive they are going to have to head out into outer space. Apparently after seeing Al Gore's new movie or too many episodes of Star Trek 2.0, Mr. Hawking has decided that space is the final frontier:

"It is important for the human race to spread out into space for the survival of the species," Hawking said. "Life on Earth is at the ever-increasing risk of being wiped out by a disaster, such as sudden global warming, nuclear war, a genetically engineered virus or other dangers we have not yet thought of."

Now your Uncle Buck is not saying he is wrong, but UB would be way more willing to go along with this assessment if Hawking wasn't a guest star on "The Simpsons" and didn't have an action figure that included a retractable boxing glove:

Best line from that episode: Homer: "Let Larry Flynt talk!"

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