Barstool Sports

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Best and Worst Sports Trophies

Every sport has a champion, every champion receives a trophy declaring them the best at what they do for that year or season or event. Here is your Uncle Buck's list of the 10 best and the 5 worst trophies in sports:

The Best:

10. Tour de France Maillot Jaune (Yellow Jersey)

The first Tour de France winner was crowned in 1903. In 1919 the over-all time leaders and over-all winner were given the Yellow Jersey and it's been done that way since (Big surprise the biggest prize for a French sport is Yellow). It's the only trophy that is used during the sporting event.
9. Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Champion Belt

This contest goes back to 1916 as four immigrants tried to settle an argument about who was the most patriotic at Nathan's Famous's first restaurant. The first winner downed 13 hot dogs in 12 minutes. The International Federation of Competitive Eating has over seen the event since 1997 and most recently the event has been dominated by Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi who currently holds the record with 53 3/4 hot dogs eaten.

8. America's Cup

The America's Cup is sailing's #1 regatta. It's called the America's Cup because America held it from the 1st race in 1851 til 1983 when Australia finally won it. 25 challenges over 113 years, the longest streak in sports history.

7. Heavyweight Boxing Champion

There was a time when this would have been the clear #1 in UB's mind, but since there are now 4 large governing bodies with world title belts (Above: Green is World Boxing Council, Red is International Boxing Federation, Black is World Boxing Association and the World Boxing Organization is not shown) and there is no desire to unify the belts, how can it be the best sports trophy. The WBA is the oldest and most recognized, dating back to 1921.

6. Heisman Trophy

The coolest actual trophy on the list, the Heisman Trophy is awarded to college football's player of the year and is so prestigious that it is given it's own live ceremony every year at the Downtown Athletic Club in New York City until 2002 when the club closed it's doors after the financial fall out from 9/11. The best thing about the trophy is if you ask just about anyone what they know about the trophy, all most all of them will try and do the pose.

5. World Series Ring

Every pro baseball player's dream is to finish their career with one or more of these. The championship symbol of America's past time is the coolest trophy of the team sports in which a series decides the winner.

4. Olympic Gold Medal

You have to wait 4 years just to compete for it and when you win it you get to stand taller than the runners up and listen to the national anthem being played.

3. Super Bowl Ring

It's the countries biggest sporting event and Dan Marino, considered by many to be the greatest quarterback of all time, doesn't have one and is though less of because of it. On the downside, as a player your fingers may have been broken so many times that you can't wear the ring when you retire.

2. The Masters Green Jacket

The Masters is one of the four golf majors and is held every year at Augusta National Golf Club in Augusta, Georgia. Since 1949 the winner is awarded a green jacket, which is the official coat worn by members of Augusta National while on the club grounds. The tournament winner becomes an honorary club member and has to return the jacket to the grounds after their 1st year as champion. Also the winner is awarded the jacket by the previous year's winner, which can be fun if that guy just came in 2nd.

"Gold jacket, green jacket...who gives a sh*t"

1. Lord Stanley's Cup

Every player on the winning team gets the cup for a day to do what ever they want with it, no questions asked...Amazingly that tradition only started in 1995...

The Worst:

5. World Cup Soccer's World Cup Trophy

1. It's not a cup.

2. Soccer Sucks.

"Didn't you get that memo?"

4. World Series Trophy

There is nothing fun about this trophy. Look at it. It looks like it could fall apart at any moment. Like the flag polls could just fall out like those little plastic bats or golf clubs on the trophies you got as a kid. And what if you dropped something in the middle there? You'd have to roll up your sleeve so it didn't get caught on a flag and carefully reach down to grab whatever it was you dropped. If that's not bad enough, it's got a lame ass name: The Commissioner's Trophy...

3. Olympic Silver Medal

Jerry Seinfeld: The Olympics is really my favorite sporting event. Although I think I have a problem with that silver medal. 'Cause when you think about it, you win the gold-you feel win the bronze-you think, "Well at least I got something." But when you win that silver it's like "Congratulations, you *almost* won. Of all the losers-you came in first of that group. You're the number one *loser*. No one lost ahead of you!"

2. Final Four net string

So you just won your "Elite Eight" game and you're now one of the Final Four teams in the NCAA Tournament. So what do you do? You cut down the net and get to keep a string. Why? For what? You gonna weave a brand new net out of that string? Wrong. You're gonna go home and hang it on the wall so everyone can see it...And ask, "What's with the string?"

1. NIT Championship Trophy

65-other teams are better than you and are playing in the NCAA Tournament. Congratulations for winning the National Invitational Tournament, aka, 66th Place.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Uncle Buck

Moments of Zen!